Get ready guys, this is it… I’m going to reveal the answer to the number one question which is – How do I know if he or she is “The One”. This is a question that many have asked me over the years, but I don’t think my answer ever satisfies them. I always get responses like, “okay then ” and silence, lol. I think they look for answers like, “he’s the one who loves God more than you,” or “once they fit all the requirements on your list, “or the worst one of all, “when you feel that magic in the air whenever they’re around you and nothing else seems to matter and birds are chirping”….
Now please allow me a moment of silence…………. Alright enough of that…lol.
These answers are all well and good, and I would really hope that your boyfriend or girlfriend puts God before everything, and yeah, you’ll have some kind of connection… But, I answer that question through my experience which goes something like this.
I met my husband for the first time at around the age of 20. It was a time of rebellion in my life; I had enough of church and just wanted something else for a change. This was not as easy as it sounds however, because my father was a pastor and it just so happened that my house was the church…lol. So, there was actually no getting away and total rebellion was just not in my nature, so I always did as my father said, but somehow found a way to show my displeasure while doing it.
My father kept telling me about this young man who was coming from abroad to live with his mother in Trinidad who was a member of our church at the time. He really wanted me to meet him and befriend him. He seemed to think that he would be spiritual and perhaps a good influence in my life.
I on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with him, simply because the recommendation to befriend him came from my dad.
Also because he said that he was spiritual. To be quite honest, even though I grew up in church, I never met a spiritual young man, and didn’t even know what that would look like. For me, there were guys, and then guys who went to church.
Finally, the day arrived; my husband came over to my house to meet my dad. Some friends dropped me home from work and as the car pulled in front my house I saw them sitting in the porch area chatting. I quickly put two and two together and realized that this was the young man my dad had been talking to me about. I really did not want to meet him; I was even tempted to tell my friends to drive on by….lol. I reluctantly came out of the car and made sure to visibly show my opposition to this. I remember the look on both my dad’s face and my husband’s as I approached. My dad was one of hope, hoping that I’d behave myself and my husband’s was one of…… awe and admiration…. lol…. just kidding.
he seemed pretty normal.
My Dad introduced us and we shook hands, I hardly looked him in the eyes and grunted “nice to meet you” then quickly walked inside before anymore conversation could begin. To my surprise and dismay, as I walked through the front door, I heard the voice of God say “That is your Husband”.
God’s voice was not audible, but I answered Him audibly and said “You would not do such a thing to me Lord”….lol.
There was no mistaking that it was God, it was the last thing I was expecting to hear, and not even the slightest thought in my heart, and this is where the answer to that question, “how do I know this is the one,” begins.
I would say that who you marry is one of the most important decisions one has to make in life. Don’t you think that God can and wants to reveal to us who’s Mr. or Mrs. Right? You either believe that God is real or not.
You also need to believe that your perfect Heavenly Father loves you and just like my earthly father only wants the best for you. So how do you know who’s “The One”? Ask your Heavenly Father, the bible says:
Matthew 7:7-11 “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him”?
One of the sincere prayers of my heart back then was that I’d choose the right person as a husband.
Someone who would lead me and my family closer to Christ and in God’s will. God has given us the Holy Spirit as a guide and comforter. He is ever present with us, so why not allow Him to speak into your life in the area of relationships? Don’t leave God out of your love life, no one can love you like He does, and every good and perfect gift comes from Him. I’m sure you can spot a good and perfect gift if it comes in your life. God’s love is so real that even in my rebellion He spoke to me. I never told my husband about what God told me on that first day that we met until we were married. Turns out, God spoke the same thing to him.
I encourage you to be sensitive to the voice of The Holy Spirit in every area of your life. He wants very much to lead us into all truth. You might ask, “how were you sure it was God?” Its not hard to recognize the fruit of something good in your life. In our courting years, my husband was a great blessing and encouragement in my life. Be honest with yourself, if you can’t say that your current relationship is a blessing from God, that’s God’s voice right there saying that that’s not “The One”.
Image 1 Credit:Â stutterstock/Amir Ridhwan
Image 2 Credit:Â stutterstock/Yak studio