I remember being a young woman in my late teens/early twenties, loving fashion and flaunting my good sense of style. To be honest with you, I did not care about what anyone thought of the way I dressed, whether it was too short or too tight. All I cared about was that I was in style and I looked good. I determined if my dress was too short or my top too low, I would consult with no one, not even the Holy spirit.
I loved the attention I would get when I walked past a young man who just had to stop what he was doing and stare. That’s me being honest and I’m sure many women reading this would admit the same if they would stop the show.
This was an area of my life that I never saw fit to submit to God.
I never considered what God thought of the way I dressed, and saw it as no big deal. After all, God had much more important things to do with His time than to be concerned about my dress.
I knew that I got more attention from men when I dressed a certain way, but honestly, I never really considered what their thoughts would be, or what those thoughts could lead to. All I was concerned about was how I felt and the attention I got from them.
I know that a lot of women plead ignorance when you point out to them that their top is too low or their pants is too tight. The default response normally is ” you think so?”…lol. 99% of the time, they are very aware of their attire and the affect it has on men, but they just don’t care about that. What’s important to them is the right fit, the right style, and if they are satisfied with what they see in the mirror.
I remember him telling me about the other side of the coin, how men can be affected by women.
He said things like, he wanted to be free to see me as a sister and not to have to fight thoughts when in my presence or have to think about where was safe to look…lol. He was also the first person to point out to me that what we say is acceptable attire on the beach, is really hypocrisy and the deadening effects of religion. The analogy he gave me to point this out went something like this.
He asked if he came over to my house and I was wearing just underwear, would I answer the door? I said no, I’ll go put on clothes first. So he then asked if he somehow got in the house and saw me in my underwear what would I do? I said hide right away and go put on some clothes. He said, so fade away the house in your mind and bring in some sand and water, does that make it okay for me to see you in your underwear?
It’s like what Jesus came to do, He said in Matthew 5:27
Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shall not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.
I pondered for a few seconds and then forgot about myself and thought about how he felt seeing me dressed like that. And would you know…. the effect is the same, whether we were home or at the beach, he’s still seeing me half naked. The only reason I would run to change my clothes when he came over was hypocrisy really. Sand and water makes the difference in how I feel, because society taught me that underwear is acceptable at the beach, but what about how he feels? The effect is the same on him no matter where I’m wearing it.
Jesus came to show us a more excellent way, one that deals with the heart and exposes hypocrisy. How can I say that I love my brothers and yet offend them by the way I dress or cause them to lust in their heart?
Or how can I even call myself a believer and claim to not be concerned about how I affect my brother, or not even care to find out if I am?
What’s even worse is if my brother points out to me personally, that my attire is affecting him and I make no adjustments, or choose to see that as his problem and not mine, then I think that makes me a hater.
As I grew in Christ and with the help of my good friend, I was able to see beyond myself and examine my heart.
I realized that I did not really love my brothers if I was okay with causing them to lust or have to fight off thoughts when in my presence. The fact that I could dress a certain way and be comfortable with it, showed me that I had issues in my heart to work out with God, but the major reason for my change was really how I affected others.
Seeing that I’m being honest, I’ll say that at times fashion still to this day, tries to dictate how I dress. There is still a fight at times. I might buy something that I really like online for example, but when I decide to wear it, I then realise that its’a bit to revealing, but I love it sooo much and I paid X amount of dollars for it, and waited so long for it to reach to my door, so the temptation to wear it is still there. I have however, allowed the Holy spirit to correct me in this area of my life, so the minute I put on something that is inappropriate,I know, and its then my choice if I’m going to walk in disobedience to God or not. I can no longer plead ignorance.
I want to encourage every woman who claims to have a relationship with the Holy spirit, to allow Him to correct you in this area of your life.
Any aspect of our lives that we shut out the voice of God can become potentially dangerous to us. This may seem like a small thing to you, but what about your brother in Christ? Or your neighbour’s husband? Or the man you sit next to in the taxi? Ladies you have the ability to allow yourself to be used by satan to cause someone to sin, simply by how you present yourselves. It’s your responsibility to dress modestly, not only because it’s who God made you to be, but also to protect your brothers.
It’s easy say that it’s your body, but is it really?
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honour God with your body.
With this scripture in mind, Please honour God with your body and have real love for your brothers. In case you are still not certain, your body actually belongs to God.
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